Crafty Ladies make Pasties

Last week I had the pleasure of attending Crafty Bitches. Yes, that is the name. It's a collaboration between the girl geniuses at OMG and the brewing extraordinaires at Jackalope. For $30 you learn a craft, get two beers and some good girl hang time. Two of my darling hooping buddies, Lauren and Meridith accompanied me on this nipple-covering journey.

Jackalope has really good relationships with the local food trucks. Most nights you can find a truck parked in front of the brewery. Which is great, because you are allowed to bring outside food into the tap room. On our night, the Wrappers Delight truck was there. I had just arrived from the gym and I was starving. I wanted the triple-six-tilapia, but they were out. I wound up getting some hawaiian chicken thing that I did not enjoy all that much. The chicken was dry and the sauce was overly sweet. But hey, I will be back for the fish wrap, for sure.

Our project was making pasties with the talented BeBe McQueen of Music City Burlesque fame. I immediately had an immense girl crush on her as she was funny, pretty, talented and super helpful. BeBe laid out all of our supplies at one table and then the mad dash to get everything was on. A bunch of 20-30 year old ladies were going bananas for glittery things. No joke. It was like the running of the bulls for the glitter foam.

I'm a classy lady, so I picked pearls for my pasties. We bundled up our beads and made tassels out of them. Mine were very long. I knew they needed a trim, but for some reason opted for the long version. Since I have yet to actually put these on, I have no opinion on my decision. After making the tassels we made some foam nipple-covering cones.

Then we took these foam things and bedazzled the shit out of them. Mine wound up looking like something Kanye West would wear on his ears. I glued jewels all over it and then gave it a generous dusting of silver glitter. I was overzealous with the glitter, as I'm still finding some in my hair, on my kitchen table and in my car.

We then attached the tassels to the decorative nipples and viola- pasties. I couldn't even touch mine since they were so overloaded with the massive amounts of glue necessary to make a pound of fake gems stick.

Every lady made a different pasty. Isn't that nice? You can tell a lot about a lady by how she chooses to spice up her areola.

Lauren looking mighty fine with her finished product

Meridith showing off her "Valentine's Day" Nips

Overall, this was a blast.  The room was filled with awesome, amazing, crafty women who just wanted to get down and have a good time with some elmer's glue. Ain't nothin' wrong with that. If you are in the Nashville area, I highly recommend checking one of these out. They do about one a month and it's a different craft each time.

The fine hooping ladies showing off their goods